./applause

So, via WoW Insider this morning, Fury Warriors feel nerfed. They get rather literary in their condemnation of Blizzard, in possibly the most intelligent QQ'ing you are likely to see for some time. I posted this on our Guild Forums, and just before lunch my husband replied with this. Ironically someone did summat very similar not long afterwards on the same thread, but I think his is better. Plus, this one is about Hunters, and you KNOW how upset the nerfs there make me... As a result, I post it for you here, in it's entirety.

Enjoy.


Waiting For God Only Knows
by S. Beckett (a Gnome of this Parish)


A country road. A tree.

Evening.

Estragon, sitting on a low mound, is trying to take off his boot. He pulls at it with both hands, panting. He gives up, exhausted, rests, tries again.

As before.

Enter Vladimir.


ESTRAGON:
Oh the swine! (He pulls up the leg of his trousers.) Blizzard's crippled me!

POZZO:
I told you they didn't like hunters.

VLADIMIR:
(to Estragon). Show me. (Estragon shows his WWS report. To Pozzo, angrily.) He's bleeding dps!

POZZO:
It's not a good sign.

ESTRAGON:
(on one leg). Hunters will never work again!

VLADIMIR:
(tenderly). Rogues and Shaman will carry you. (Pause.) If necessary.

POZZO:
They've stopped crying. (To Estragon.) Hunters have replaced them as it were. (Lyrically.) The tears of the world are a constant quantity. For each class who begins to weep, somewhere else another class stops. The same is true of the laugh. (He laughs.) Let us not then speak ill of the last patch, it is not any unhappier than its predecessors. (Pause.) Let us not speak well of it either. (Pause.) Let us not speak of it at all. (Pause. Judiciously.) It is true the server population has increased.

ESTRAGON:
I hear something.

POZZO:
Where?

VLADIMIR:
It's the forums.

POZZO:
(disappointed). Damnation!

VLADIMIR:
Silence!

ESTRAGON:
Perhaps the QQing has stopped.

They straighten up.

POZZO:
Which of you smells so bad?

ESTRAGON:
He has stinking breath and I have stinking feet.

POZZO:
I must go.

ESTRAGON:
And your half-hunter?

POZZO:
I must have left him at the inn.

Silence.

ESTRAGON:
Then adieu.

POZZO:
Adieu.

VLADIMIR:
Adieu.

POZZO:
Adieu.

Silence. No one moves.

VLADIMIR:
Adieu.

POZZO:
Adieu.

ESTRAGON:
Adieu.

Silence.

POZZO:
And thank you.

VLADIMIR:
Thank you.

POZZO:
Not at all.

Silence.

POZZO:
I don't seem to be able . . . (long hesitation) . . . to log off.